Struggling.....

So hear it is April 25th and I am expected to be on a plane in less than a month (May 15th to be exact) to Ghana to meet our boys for the first time and spend time with them.

So many emotions these past couple of weeks about leaving.  We were advised to plan on a 2 week "bonding period" and then we would come back a few weeks later for our court date.  After much family discussion, it was agreed that Evan would go with me on the first trip.  Andy and I agreed we couldn't both leave our kids for two weeks but I can't bear to be away from my whole family for two weeks.  So, as a family, it was decided Evan would join me. 

Evan is thrilled at the thought of spending 2 weeks with his brothers and all the other kids at the orphanage.  He sees this as an adventure and let's face it, 2 weeks away from sisters and school is most appealing to a 9 year old boy!   Although, he had to agree to be "home schooled" by me during our 2 weeks away.  Thankfully, his principal blessed our trip and agreed it would be an incredible opportunity for Evan.

Now the struggle......

So I woke up this morning feeling very strongly about putting this out there because I know that when He does work this out,  it will be in His time and the reason and timing will not only be a lesson for me but will be a testimony to others. 

We have gotten to a place where finances are preventing us from taking that next "leap of faith".  The flights alone for two to Ghana are $3200. right now.   Up until this point, the money has always come just when we needed it.    I know it will now too.  I'm just getting a little impatient.  The longer we wait to book our flights, we risk the prices going up.

I wondered if this is a sign we need to postpone the initial trip.  I just don't know but for some reason, we cannot take that leap to book our flights just yet.   I've had a few offers from friends wanting to initiate fundraising for our adoption but I just have not felt comfortable doing that for many reasons.  I feel like there are so many families out there that need it worse than we do. 

Because God has had His hand on every aspect of this adoption process, I know He is still right here with us and He will see us through to the next phase of our journey.  One of my dear friends told me this morning that He puts us through these hurdles so that when we get through them, we are more grateful and He is more glorified. 

~Andrea